Imagine that at the end of Dumbledore’s speech at the beginning of the year, he asks if there are any questions, and one first year muggleborn kid raises his hand, whips out a smart phone and asks for the wifi password.
And then Dumbledore just casually says “Sherbet lemon, with a capital S”, and commences the feast like it’s no big deal while the non-muggleborns think WIFI is some sort of secret society.
Talk to me, distract me.
From the piece of wood piercing your abdomen?
Okay, remember our first date? You were nervous. I ordered kale to impress you and you ordered fries to impress me. Remember?
Remember when James was born? I was scared he wouldn’t make it and you were so sure he would. I remember having to pry him out of your arms just to get a chance to hold him. You were so protective of him once he finally made it into the world. Maura? Are you still with me?
Y-yes, I’m…I’m here.
Remember when James and I were sick and you stayed home to take care both of us? You missed your favorite conference for that.
I love you.
I know. So stay for me.
But I can’t.
You have to, Maura. I need you. James needs you. Your parents, my Ma, your sister, my brothers - they need you. You are the glue that holds us all together. I can’t do this on my own. I can’t raise James on my own without you. He’ll end up like me, Maura. I know you don’t want that.
He’ll be so brave, Jane. If he’s like you…he’ll be such a brave and kind man. I want him to be like you…just like…
Please don’t leave me…Maura! Please! I love you too…I love you too.
#And that’s when EMS shows up#they slap a respirator on Maura#hang 2 units of fluids#Jane decks the paramedic who says she can’t ride in the bus#they all go to the hospital#and when Maura wakes up#Jane is passed out beside her#and she spends a long time watching Jane and messing with pieces of her hair#and finally someone remembers to call James#and it makes a fantastic story for James’ wedding reception#because he ends up marrying the doctor who operated and saved Maura#ta da#i saved it#and it’s barely lunch time
Dear Mr. Potter,
We are pleased to inform that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.
Term begins on September 1. We await your owl by no later than July 31.
Harry Potter au where Harry didn’t lose being a parsletongue and Albus buys a snake as a pet one year because snakes are cool and one day just walks in on Harry and the snake having a deep conversation
Bonus points if it’s the kids of the snake from the zoo.
'My mum always spoke kindly of you for freeing her'
Panda researchers in China wear panda costumes to give mother-like feeling to a lonely baby panda who lost her mother [x]
without context it looks like some guy disguised himself as a panda so he could sneak into their panda community and now he’s making a quick getaway with the baby panda
i almost got arrested when i was 7 because i was putting that fake snow stuff in plastic sandwich baggies and giving them to all my friends and more and more kids would come to me asking for snow and one of the kid’s parents found it and they thought it was cocaine so they called the police on us and they literally thought that a 7 year old girl had created an underground drug distributing system